My deepest fear

I'm really feeling this quote right now. It seems it's my own fears that keep me from being all I can be. I have such an amazing opportunity before me, and all I have to do is believe in myself and do everything I've ever wanted to do. It's an amazing yet frightening feeling. It's truly inspiring. :)

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson (from A Return to Love)

Yay Job!!!

I feel I have so much to update everyone on!

We just got back from an amazing, relaxing, and refreshing trip to Florida.  It seems every trip to Florida makes us feel refreshed and renewed.  I think the ocean has something to do with it. ;)

We literally spent every day at the beach while we were there.  The boys are turning into quite the little surfer dudes!

So, an update on the life of the Allens:  Things seem to change day to day on this great adventure, but things are slowly falling into place.

The first big announcement – I got a job!!  It is the one I spoke about in the previous post.  It’s for a company called JunkRecycling.  It is a junk removal company that does everything possible to keep the junk they collect from going into the landfill.  They’ll break things apart and recycle what they can, and if they get furniture, they sell it at their thrift store called The Regeneration Station.  That’s where I come in!  I am the new manager of The Regeneration Station!  I’ll be in charge of getting the store in order, networking with other business and organizations, and working with local artists who come in and redo these old pieces of furniture.  And, I’ll get to redo some stuff myself and get all crafty and creative all the time!  They also do a lot of community work giving away beds and couches to area families in need.  And we’ll be throwing fun events and host kid craft nights with all the scrap materials we collect.  Lots and lots and lots of possibilities!

“But Kim,” you may be asking, “you are a teacher…you’ve never worked retail before.  What are you doing managing a retail store??!”

I asked myself those same questions when I had this weird inkling (that would NOT go away) to apply for the position after seeing the ad posted on Craigslist.  I ran across it one day and thought it sounded neat, but I dismissed it thinking, “Get real, Kim.”  Then Dustin and I went to this festival while down in Louisiana with our friend Kim who owns the Downtown Gypsy (and who is my creative, crafty mentor).  I told her about the job posting and we started talking about all the fun things we could do with all the “junk” that is collected.  It got my creative juices flowing, so I decided, why not?  I sent in my resume and cover letter the next day.

About a week later, I got a call from Tyler, the owner of Junk Recycling.  He said he read over my cover letter and really liked my energy and spirit (yay!).  We did a short phone interview and made plans for a face to face interview the day after we got to North Carolina.  The first interview went great, and Tyler and I hit it off immediately.  He has a lot of big ideas for the company and just needs someone to hop on board and help make it all become a reality. 

We scheduled a second interview for later on that week for which I had to basically come up with a plan of what I would do with the store if it were mine.  I presented my plan and shared my ideas (that include LOTS of fun events with local art studios and shops!), and he loved it.  He said that he’s had many of the same ideas and that it seemed I really understood who they are as a company and what their vision is for the future.  He called me on Tuesday and offered me the job!

He admitted that on paper, I am not qualified for this job at all (other than my business experience with School of Rock).  He said that it came down to me and one other guy, and the other guy had all the retail experience they wanted.  (He actually had me going for a minute thinking that I didn’t get the job.)  But then he went on to say why he chose me over the other guy.  He said that he really liked my energy, passion, and enthusiasm.  He said that he could tell I was creative and a go-getter and that he had this hunch that I could be the one to grow with the company. 

So even though I have a TON to learn about running a retail store, I know that I can do it.  I really enjoyed the business side of School of Rock, so I’m excited to utilize those talents and abilities again and see what I can do with this.  When we decided to move to Asheville and I started the job hunt, I just kept affirming over and over again that I wanted to be used for good however I could.  I wanted to see what good I could offer the community and get involved however I can.  Then this came up and I just feel deep down that it is right! 

I start Monday morning, so keep me in your thoughts! J

Regarding everything else with getting our lives started here, Dustin has a couple of job prospects lined up that he’ll look into more this week, and he’s going to get registered for fall classes to finish his degree.  

We’re still on the hunt for a home, so keep the positives vibes coming!!

Love you all!

Kim

We live in North Carolina!!!!

We did it! We packed up our entire home in a Uhaul (barely...I'm good at underestimating how much stuff I own) and we drove 12 hrs to our adorable and perfect cabin in Black Mountain, NC. The drive was...ok. I almost became a two-time divorcee a few times, but we made it. ;)

Seriously though, things couldn't have gone better. My husband and I freaking rock and are so good together. He's my best friend and partner in this journey, and sometimes I sit in awe of the love we share. He's my love. My Bu. This move has done nothing but make us stronger and closer. And grateful! We were both near tears last night sitting out on the deck under the mountain stars. When we think about how amazing and happy our lives are, we are overwhelmed with gratitude and often times don't feel deserving.

We definitely have our work cut out for us over the next several weeks. But we are filled with such energy and enthusiasm that we view the situation not as "how are we going to make this work???" but rather, "how are we going to be used here?". This is such an amazing community and we both are going to have the opportunity to get involved in things and literally do whatever we want. There's so many options!

I actually had a job interview yesterday with a local junk removal/recycling company who is now opening a thrift store of sorts selling all re-purposed, refurbished used furniture. They're really active in the community by giving away a lot of furniture to families in need, and they have the opportunity to expand even more. I go back for a second interview on Friday, so I'll give more details after that. But keep me in your thoughts!

Long story short, we are extremely excited to be here and can't wait to see what good we can offer the community. We're both really keeping our employment options open and just seeing what opportunities come up as we explore the community.

And being with the boys...oh my goodness. This little cabin has been filled with so much joy the past two days. I love waking up to cuddles from Julien (who has decided he now wants to be called "Jax", haha). He came in this morning and just wrapped his arms around me and said, "I love you my little snowball!" then threw his head back for that ha ha ha Julien laugh. Then he ran out and ran back in a minute later crying, "I just wanna hold you!" and attacked me with a hug. :) I mean, who can complain when they get to wake up to that cuteness in the morning? ;)

Well, there's no Internet at the cabin and barely any cell signal, so my Internet availability will be sparse. I'll make it to a coffee shop with some wifi here soon so I can update more.

Thank you all so much for all your thoughts, prayers, and support!! Our hearts can feel all that love! :)

Live in an RV?? Maybe...

Over the last couple of days, Dustin and I have been toying around with this idea of buying an RV of some sort and living in it for the next couple years.  We aren’t ready to buy a house right away, but I hate the idea of paying so much for rent each month for something that we can’t even call ours.  I feel like I’m just throwing money away.  Having to leave so suddenly after the investment we made in our little house in here in Louisiana is tough.  I’m ready to just have something that I can call mine! 

So we’re having these grand visions of buying an RV and redecorating on the inside to make it our home.  I originally got this idea from my friend Kim whose dream is to get a 1970’s era Airstream and travel across the country selling her cute crafty things at festivals and markets.  She is queen when it comes to vintage/thrifty decorating, so of course, she has tons of cute ideas of how to utilize and decorate such a small space.  We can either rent or buy some land in North Carolina.  Heck, we could even just park it at one of those RV camps that have swimming pools and nice showers.  We care more about the surroundings of our home than the interiors.  I want to be able to walk out my door and be surrounded in the peace of nature.  

So much that I would be willing to live in less than 200 square feet. 

We’re at that the beginning of an adventure in our lives once again, and it is time for us to get creative and think about the kind of life we want to be living.  I’m starting to wade in student loan debt, and I want to find a creative solution to keep from being swallowed.  That’s why I’m starting to write more.  That’s why we’re gardening and going vegetarian (quality meat is expensive! ).  I think a lot of our generation is starting to do the same.  We’re at our creative peaks in life, and it’s our turn to see what we can do with that energy.

So I’m going to start crunching some numbers.  How I see it, is that if the expenses of getting a loan to buy an RV (hopefully with at least a little down payment since we’ll end up selling a lot of our things) and getting land (be it renting, buying, or at an RV park) is less than what it would cost to rent a house or apartment, then it just kind of makes sense.  Sure, it would be a really small space and a complete lifestyle change, but I try to look at how exciting it can be.  Just a change of pace.  It could help save a lot of money, and I think it would help bring out my creative side.  (I could turn it into a really cool blog! Something about how to live small and simple.)

Long story short, I know that I will be happy no matter where I am.  I’ve never been more at peace in my life than right now.  I try to view everything as an opportunity to get creative and express myself.  What do I want to do?  What do I want to do?

Another opportunity before us we’re thinking about is living on an organic farm.  We’ll be meeting with a man who owns Goodlove’s Friendly Farm and has two homes that he rents out on the property.  We would help take care of chickens and have a set plot of land that we can garden on.  It’s about 40 minutes outside of Asheville, but we think the distance might be worth it.  Dustin’s already mentioned it to Rebecca, and she was supportive.  It’s absolutely beautiful out there.  Beyond words.  And it would be a great opportunity to get experience living a sustainable lifestyle.  Our dream is to be able to grow most of our own food and become less reliable on all the junk that’s out there.  We just want to be healthy, happy, and good to the earth.

It’s exciting to examine all these new possibilities before us to find the one that make us feel fulfilled, a way for us to make our life our own and just be happy. 

I just love it when things work out :)

So remember how I was talking yesterday about needing to find a furnished place for the month of July within the next two days?  Well, guess what happened just a couple hours after I posted that yesterday?! :)

The lady who owns this little cottage in the mountains saw this ad that I posted on Craigslist for me and Dustin about how we needed a place to stay for July.  So she is renting it to us for the same amount we would pay for rent at the apartment we lined up. :) YAY!!!!

And this was definitely one of those things that are just meant to be and perfect.  First off, the lady who called me was amazing and super sweet!  She is from Wisconsin and lives in the cottage with her daughter.  They are leaving for the month to go visit her family in WI, so she wants to rent her cottage out to someone she can trust to respect her things.  She said she saw my ad and could just tell from reading it that we were good people and she wanted to help us out!  She said that she normally likes to meet the people before she rents out her cottage, but she said that she could just tell over the phone that I was really sweet and that she just felt good about the situation!  How awesome is that?!

So here's the amazingness of this cottage.  First off, it's in the mountains, so that makes it a winner right there.  But it's also close enough to town and doesn't require driving on crazy steep, curvy mountain roads.  (Which we drove on last time we were in NC looking at houses...It's a little unsettling to look out your window when driving and just see about five feet of road to the side of you and then just a cliff and tall trees everywhere.  I think I get that tiny fear of heights from my momma...)  The cottage is all artsy with pretty bright colors and pieces of art decorating the walls.  She's musical, too, so she said there's a couple of guitars laying around.  It has a garden and fire pit, and close to TONS of hiking trails.  She said she has tons of hiking gear and packs that we are welcome to use.  She also has an arts and craft station in her kitchen, and she said to help ourselves to any of it and get creative!  She said she was going to take all the family pictures down so that we would just feel like it's our place and feel at home.  She also said she'd clear out a closet for us and a couple of drawers in her dresser.  (How sweet is that?!)

Last, but certainly not least, there is a Migun Therapeutic Massage bed in the cottage.  (Don't worry, I had never heard of it. either.)  Here's a commercial for one:

So yeah, we're going to have a fabulous month.  All of this stress is wreaking havoc on our backs and necks, so it will be fantastic to have something like this to use everyday.  Absolute.Heaven.

I'm just blown away with how awesome and accommodating the owner is.  She seems like a super awesome, down-to-earth lady, so this arrangement could lead to us making some new friends. :)

We both feel very good today now that we have some plans set and something to look forward to.  We're looking forward to enjoying our last week in Monroe, and then starting this new adventure!

One More Week!

We're getting ready for our last week in Louisiana!  Which is pretty freaking ridiculous to think about, haha.  We're trying to get things squared away and ready for the move, but we're still taking things a day at a time.

We got approved for an apartment, but it comes with a 14 month lease (14?!) which makes me a little nervous.  I already don't like the idea of an apartment to begin with (it's hard with two dogs who are used to having a fenced in backyard...), so I definitely don't want to get stuck there for 14 months.

So we're looking into just throwing our stuff in storage for a month and finding a furnished place to stay throughout July.  That would give us the month to get to know the area better and hopefully find a house we'll be happy in.  We are very ready to settle down for a bit, so we would rather take this month to find something more permanent than just getting an apartment and taking it from there.  I just want to feel settled after this whirlwind of a year.  I want to be able to decorate and garden without knowing that I'm just going to leave it in a matter months.  Now we just need to find a furnished place for July in the next two days...

We're trying not to stress and worry because we know that does us no good.  (And we know, worst case scenario, we do the apartment thing and just deal with it.)  But it's gets a little stressful at times and led to some tension this week.  I just hate that it (the stress of trying to find a place to live) consumes so much of my thinking.  I spend hours scouring the internet for prospective homes, sending emails, making phone calls, etc.  It's exhausting.  I know it's come to the point where I just have to  make a decision and go with it, but I know I'll still end up waiting until the very last second before that decision is made.  You never know what can happen.  So what if we'll be in Asheville a week from today and we still don't know where we're going to live?  No biggie.  We got this.  It will all work out.  It always does, right?

The past two weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions.  We are beyond excited to get to Asheville.  To the point where we almost feel as if we're in purgatory right now, just waiting.  We've done all we can from afar in regards to job searches, so we're just waiting to get there so that we can actually go into places, drop off resumes, etc.  We miss the boys like crazy, and they are SO excited for us to get there.  I feel like a kid who found all the hidden Christmas presents a month before Christmas.  We know what amazing, fun things await, but we can't have it just yet.

To help with our patience (and, admittedly, our sanity) we've been doing a lot of soul searching and feeding the past two weeks.  Since I'm on summer break, my schedule is wide open, so I've been spending a lot of time meditating, praying, and journaling.  So has Dustin.  We realize how important this time in our lives is and that we have the freedom and ability to basically go wherever we want to go with it.  We're going to have countless opportunities before us, so we've spent a lot of quiet time focusing on what it is we truly want.  Then we just examine the opportunities before us.  (For example, I'm seriously considering apply for this job managing a used furniture warehouse.  I'd basically get to go through discarded household items, find things that are salvageable, and then get creative with it and resell it.  How awesome would that be!  I'd get to redo old furniture all day long!)  We know we need to stay realistic, and school is basically number one for both of us right now, so we're just looking into things that could maybe be a welcomed change of pace.

Dustin and I realize the challenges that we are up against, but we also realize that we are in control of making this situation whatever we want it to be.  We've been reading a lot about blessing unfavorable situations/people, so we have our list of blessings that we read through every day.  We bless our move to Asheville, our job searches, our house hunting, etc.  instead of letting fear take control causing thoughts of worry and anxiety, we focus on the inner peace we have knowing that we will be taken care of and that good things will come from this move.  We truly believe that we are meant to be in Asheville and that living there will enhance basically every area of our lives. We believe that our thoughts create our reality and that if we focus our minds on nothing but thoughts of prosperity, love, and joy, then nothing but that will ensue in our lives.

So keep us in your thoughts and prayers over the next week as we finalize our plans for North Carolina.  Pray for things to fall into place and for the move to go smoothly.

Due to all the meditating and writing I've been doing lately, I finally decided to get a spiritual blog going that I've been thinking about for a long time.  Those of you who know me well know that I'm a deeply spiritual person who strives to do nothing but good in life.  So travel over to Soliloquy of the Soul as we discover together how to be happy and do good things in the world.  I'm still working on getting some articles up, so be patient with me! :)

I hope you all have a wonderful Sunday!

Things I Will Miss About Louisiana - Part II

Our Sweet Little Neighbor Puppy

Onto the next thing that will make me cry when I say goodbye – our sweet little neighbor puppy, Sadie.

She won our hearts quickly because she’s a love bug and sadly neglected.  She used to belong to the man that lived next door.  But when the man left his wife, he couldn’t take his dogs with him, so he had to leave Sadie and her sister (a golden retriever) behind.  The golden retriever died from a heartworm infection right before we moved in.  So Sadie was abandoned with the woman who rarely feeds her and never gives her any attention.  So we sneak food out to her pretty much regularly (along with our other neighbor who shares a fence with her). 

She has a problem of digging under the fences and getting into our backyards.  One night, we opened up the back door and found Sadie on our back porch, sniffing around.  We decided to just let her in and give her some love for the night.  We gave her some food and water, brushed her, and even gave her a bath and clipped her nails.  Then we all cuddled on the couch for a bit before Murphy started getting all territorial, and he and Sadie started to fight.  (There was a previous time where we let Sadie into the backyard to play one night, and it ended Sadie biting Murphy's butt.  Not vicious, mean biting, but just "leave me the hell alone" biting.  So we wanted to avoid any further confrontations.)  

She really is a sweetheart.  Whenever I go outside, she comes running to the fence and runs back and forth (hoping I'm bringing her food) like this: 

And even when I don't have food for her, she's still all adorable like this: (pardon my baby talk - I'm one of "those" people when it comes to animals...)

Side-note, I find it awesome that her coat matches Izzy and Murphy.  I guess I just attract orange and white dogs. J

It just breaks my heart to see her outside and alone 24/7. :(  If we could handle three dogs, I would totally puppynap her and take her with us to North Carolina.  She can be a mountain puppy.